mother's day 2019

 

These pictures very much describe what it is like to be a mother to our children. It's chaotic, busy, crazy...but so fun and there's definitely a lot of laughter. (Rudger really wanted a picture where he was popping out. I love that boy!) It's all I ever wanted and although it brings a lot of exhausting days and tears, it is THE very most rewarding job there ever was. And I couldn't be happier. 

In primary, the song leader gave each of the kids a package of m&ms with some things to talk about with their moms. The kids were SO excited about it. Adeline couldn't wait to come home and eat them!

I was excited to warm up the grill for the season and have a charcuterie board as well as raspberry lemonade! The lilacs are perfect right now, so they were a must for the table. 

We loved having Justin's parents join us for dinner. Justin's mom is so sweet and always amazing at being so helpful when she is in our home!

I love my mom, Justin's mom, the other mom's in my life that are a huge influence in my life. I love the kids who made me a mother and the man who is by my side on this motherhood journey!

 (I just love this picture ♥♥)

Mother's Day

I feel grateful everyday that I have been given the opportunity to be a mother to these five children. Being a mother is a beautiful, exhausting, and joyful experience. These kids (along with their daddy) have made me the person that I am today. There is still so much growth for me to go through still, but I have worked really hard to get where I am and I am happy with my improvements. 

I was asked to speak on Mother's day about the Joy I feel in teaching my children about Jesus Christ. If I am going to speak about anything, this is the perfect subject. I love teaching my children about the things that matter most. I love teaching them principles that bring us closer to our Savior. My talk was based on what The Proclamation to the World teaches us about having successful marriages and families. faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities It really was an honor to speak on motherhood. And it's an even greater honor to be a mother. ♥♥

mother's day

Today I feel so grateful for these five kids that call me mom. I feel so grateful that I get to be a mother. I feel grateful that the dreams I had as a young girl have come true. I have had really, really good mom days and really, really bad mom days, and then every other kind of day in between. And honestly, I am grateful for each one of those days. Those bitter days sure make those sweet days incredible.  

Yesterday was definitely one of those sweet days! With Justin's help, the youngest three emailed a special Mother's day surprise.

This is my first Mother's Day with our sweet Adeline. It has been over six months and I sometimes still can't believe she is here. I find myself often squealing with delight knowing she is in this family of ours! Her gift to me is wanting me...all. the. time...and I love that gift.

When I opened the email from Rudger the words "I love you with my biggest smile and as much cuteness as I can muster!!!" were attached to this picture. I died. He knows just how to steal my heart.

A couple of days before Sunday, Levi came home with a surprise in his backpack, but he ran to his room to make certain it was well hidden. After being sad for a little bit in the morning, he came quietly into the family room and handed me his gift. I love it dearly. And this picture cracks me up with the mustache he drew on his face :) Levi is FULL of personality and that makes my heart happy! And his message... "I love you so much Mom! It's my day to give you lots of hugs and kisses"...love!

Taylor gives the best hugs and that's what I wanted most from him. So to read on his card that I make him feel good when I give him a hug made me cry happy tears. I loved the cards and the adorable gift he gave to me! 

Corbin has a very kind heart, and has shown a great amount of that kindness these past few months. I believe this boy knows my love language is service. There have been multiple acts of service he has done for me recently that have made my heart swell!

And of course, I believe it all begins with the dad. Justin continues to show gratitude towards me. He is completely patient with me as I fail time and time again. He never gives up on me and continues to encourage me to be my best. It is no wonder the children are following in his footsteps. I am so grateful to be partners with him on this parenting journey.

all i ever wanted

Growing up there were times that I wanted to be a kindergarten teacher, a secretary, a home economics teacher, even a country singer. But all I really ever wanted to be was a mother. I feel so grateful that I have been allowed to watch over these boys while they are here on this earth. I am grateful they call me mom, mama, mommy, and even hot ma (thanks to Justin teaching that to Rudger)...  I am also so grateful that each day is a new day, a new day to try again to be a little better mommy than I was the day before. 

"oh how we need general conference!"

Elder Robert D. Hales

"Through conferences our faith is fortified and our testimonies deepened. And when we are converted, we strengthen each other to stand strong amid the fiery darts of these last days."

Carole M. Stephens

"We all need each other. Sons of God need daughters of God, and daughters of God need sons of God.

We have different gifts and different strengths. First Corinthians chapter 12 emphasizes the need for sons and daughters of God, each one of us, to fulfill our individual roles and responsibilities according to the Lord’s plan, that all may benefit."

President Dieter F. Uchtdort

"Doubt your doubt before you doubt your faith."

President Boyd K. Packer

"Parents today wonder if there is a safe place to raise children. There is a safe place. It is in a gospel-centered home. "

Elder D. Todd Christofferson

"A woman’s moral influence is nowhere more powerfully felt or more beneficially employed than in the home."

"My plea to women and girls today is to protect and cultivate the moral force that is within you. Preserve that innate virtue and the unique gifts you bring with you into the world."

Elder S. Gifford Nielsen
"I know we each must develop and carry out our own personal game plan to serve with enthusiasm alongside the full-time missionaries—EXCLAMATION POINT!"

And so many more good words from this conference. 

It makes my heart so happy when our children get excited for conference, even if it's because of the crepes, sleeping in tents, m&m's and bingo. I'll take it, because it's the consistency that matters and I'm sure, one day, they'll realize just how much we need general conference!!

Poor guy was trying so hard for so long to get those chocolate chips and anything else his brothers had.

and because I love being a wife and mother so much and because I love this family of mine so intensely, I want to be with them forever! 

Oh how I need general conference!

love these four boys

I know mother's day has come and gone. But I'm okay to think about how much I love being their mother everyday.

Having four boys can be somewhat exhausting at times. Probably not any more than anyone who has four kids in general. But I'm not sure if girls are dragging in every cool rock they find outside. Not sure if they drag legos is every single room in the house. Not sure if they are wrestling each other everyday. I just don't know. Are they? 
But I'm okay with all that boys bring because I really kind of like these boys. I just can't imagine it any other way.

Whenever we are all out running errands, I get at least one comment like this...

"wow you have your hands full"

"oh, I'm sorry"

"you need a girl"

No, please don't feel bad for me. I am so happy. I would never EVER trade one of these boys just to have a girl. 

Would that be tacky to tape a sign to me that says that??

but then sometimes I get this comment...

"I have all boys. It's great."

On another note.

I sometimes feel like I am failing as a parent because our boys aren't in every extra curricular activity. They didn't go to pre-school. And we don't take our kids to every theme park around. I know *gasp*. For some reason, they get excited to jump on the tramp, play in the sandbox, be creative with what we have at home, read books with mom, and make treats together. We will be having one of our first big family vacations this year....and it's not to Disneyland! I know our boys are happy, but again, I still feel at times that people look down on us because we aren't giving our children more.

Then I read a fantastic article in the ensign last night!

For one year, they chose to forgo dance and sports; instead they prepared meals, learned Primary songs, visited museums, and played outdoors. “Our children were able to feel the Spirit … because we took the time to stop and listen,” Amy says. Their children may not be the top sports and dance stars, she says, “but they have a testimony of the Savior.”

Love! Love! Love! And that is my goal as a mother.

I also hope that I can discover who they are, what their talents are, and then help each of them grow into the man that they are meant to become individually. Thank goodness Justin is my partner in this!

 And while I am discovering and trying to do my best, I hope that they feel my complete love for each one of them.

sometimes you just have to jump

Have you tried jumping on a trampoline recently?

The boys, especially Corbin, so often ask me to come jump with them. More often then not, I tell them not right now. Dishes need to be done, dinner needs to be made, bills need to be paid, I need to make another phone call, Rudger needs me, or I just don't want to. 

But I'm trying to be better at not always saying, maybe later. How about, yes I will...right now!

Then I remember, nothing makes me feel like a kid again than jumping on the trampoline.

second chances

I'm so grateful for second chances. That's what this whole life is full of. We are given second chances over and over again.

Recently, because of modern technology and good doctors, my dad's heart has been given a second chance!   It has made me realize how fragile our bodies are and we never know how long we really have on this earth.  I want my boys and all my nieces and nephews to spend many years with my dad...and I'm hoping they will inherit some of that sense of humor. So grateful for my dad.

I'm also so grateful to have a second chance at parenting. I feel like I'm given second chances all the time. These boys of ours are always so forgiving and patient with me while I try to figure this whole mom thing out. 

You would think that after almost nine years I would have my priorities straighten out, good rules in our home that made us have perfect obedient children at all times, I would never raise my voice, I would know the answer to every question my children have, I would know the right thing to say at the right time it needed to be said, I would understand your emotions and know what each of you needed all the time.  But for some reason, it's just not so.

 Later last week, I did not have my best parenting moments. I was so tired and frustrated at the end of the day. I was tired of having to ask boys over and over and over again to do something, I was tired of the messes, I was tired of too many boys loving Rudger too much, I was tired of the noise, I was tired of homework, I was tired of nagging.  

Meditating helped a little.

 I went to bed that night praying for forgiveness and rededicated myself to being a better mom. I looked at each of the boys and realized that I truly have the best, but the hardest job in the world. I wouldn't ever. EVER. trade it for anything. Even on those bad days. 

To my surprise each boy woke up the next morning so happy and so willing to give me a second chance. 

 And last night for family home evening, we talked about how grateful we are for our home, we have come up with some great ways for each of us to help out in our home, so that it will be a place that we will all want to be. 

And thanks to my amazing partner in this parenting journey. I couldn't imagine taking this journey with anyone else. He is always able to handle things when I just can't. The boys need him as much as I do. And he's always giving me second chances :)

I'm so grateful for second chances!